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Post by EyesofanAngel20 on Apr 20, 2005 21:14:22 GMT -5
Today I got outside for about thirty minutes (which made my dad really mad). It helped, but when I went back inside, I barely passed the eight billion tests I had to take. My dad got so mad at me that he started swearing. My dad never swears, so it scares me when he does. He has never hit me before, but today, he went to get a belt and said that he was going to beat me, which he really was going to do, but thank God he didn't find a belt. He told me that I was a failure and that I would never get into college and be a vet. He kept cutting me down alot and then he got my diary (he took my DIARY and READ it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) and started reading it out loud to my mom. I had very personal things in there. I finally have it back, but Im terrified to write in it. Thats what I need to do. I need to write down my true feelings and have them kept secret, but I can't because Im afraid that he'll read it again! I got so depressed that I couldn't move and I couldn't talk. I tried but I couldn't. Ive never been that bad. I told my mom that I would be better off dead and that I should have killed myself when I had the chance. What should I do? I have to result to asking complete strangers for help because there is no one else to talk to.
PS: thanks, laila for your help, thats very nice of you.
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surfergirl16
Newbie
This is how I feel on a NORMAL day...
Posts: 36
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Post by surfergirl16 on Apr 20, 2005 21:24:26 GMT -5
Im sorry hun! Cheer up! its gonna be ok! just trust God and He will make things better. Im praying for you!
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Post by ava on Apr 20, 2005 22:30:04 GMT -5
This may or may not be good advice, but...
Iinvasion of privacy is one of the things that pises me off more than anything. overprotectivism are one thing, but reading your diary and then pouring salt in the wound by making a big arsehole-ish production out of it is completely over the line.
Next time it happens, if I were you I'd go psychotic on all their asses. Read your diary, with your feelings in it, and then go nazi-ish because they dont happen to like the contents? To hell with that; I would have freaking lost it.
Mod edit for filter evasion
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surfergirl16
Newbie
This is how I feel on a NORMAL day...
Posts: 36
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Post by surfergirl16 on Apr 21, 2005 9:18:43 GMT -5
ummm...nice language...anyway, invasion of privacy makes me VERY angry. If my parents ever did that to me, then I'd freak out! sry they did that to you beth!
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Post by Shodan on Apr 21, 2005 9:24:38 GMT -5
please do not try to get around the filter people. it is there for a reason.
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Post by ava on Apr 21, 2005 14:03:11 GMT -5
sorry. *fixes*
The flagrant invasion of people's privacy gets me rather angry, as my own parents go through my mail and things, and have threatened to actually remove my door if they think I'm doing things they won't like.
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Post by EyesofanAngel20 on Apr 21, 2005 21:42:25 GMT -5
wow. thats gotta be tough! i would so move out. i cant wait until i get my own place!
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surfergirl16
Newbie
This is how I feel on a NORMAL day...
Posts: 36
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Post by surfergirl16 on Apr 23, 2005 21:09:47 GMT -5
are you doing ok?
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Post by EyesofanAngel20 on Apr 23, 2005 21:21:12 GMT -5
yeah, i am. i didnt do school today (for once i have a free weekend) i finally cleaned my room! i can actually breathe now...and see the floor. im going to church tomorrow. its my best friends birthday, and i get to see Philip and Jeremy! yippee!!!! sry.
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Post by Dancing with Suicide on Apr 29, 2005 23:07:45 GMT -5
we all have our bad days... it's human nature... it'll be ok...
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Post by EyesofanAngel20 on May 1, 2005 17:59:06 GMT -5
thanks! i am doing really good cuz last night was my fairy tale with philip.
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